More on Boundaries

•MORE ON BOUNDARIES•
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I’ve been talking a LOT about this one, because it’s something I’m working through HARD right now, & the Universe keeps presenting with with more & more situations around “boundaries” so that I can REALLY step into having a firm sense of them. I like to share my processes as I *grow* through them in case they are helpful for y’all, too!
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One of my friends made a comment recently about that the other thing about boundaries is that they are for YOU to decide. YOUR boundaries are not determined over whether someone else thinks it is a “healthy” or “unhealthy” boundary. Your boundaries are YOURS.
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This was a great reminder for me all this week. That I can honor myself & my boundaries and they are NEVER WRONG. They are always right where I need them to be for me in any moment.
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Another thing I’m learning about this week is that, I can always remove myself from a situation in which I have laid a boundary & another person keeps pushing it no matter how strongly I reinforce my verbal cues.
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IT IS NOT OUR JOB TO WORRY ABOUT HOW THE OTHER PERSON FEELS ABOUT OUR BOUNDARIES.
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THIS is an area of codependent behavior I have begun to recognize I can often fall into.
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Overstepping my boundaries because someone else is emoting in reaction to my boundaries.
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Their reaction is their work. NOT MINE.
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MY reaction is MY WORK. Not theirs.
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The thing is that we don’t really do others any services by emotionally caretaking them anyway. I’m starting to learn that, for myself, it is a mechanism I have long used as a method for safety & survival that I had to develop at a young age.
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But, when I am taking responsibility for other people’s work, I am denying them their healing, their process, their growth.
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I am doing BOTH of us a disservice.
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It’s important that we learn to have our boundaries & then let the pieces fall where they may. Let the other person process them how they need to, feel how they need to, erect the boundaries they need to, without trying to change how that looks for them. I believe that then they can reciprocate that behavior in regards to our feelings.
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Yours in Oneness🧡Freedom
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